"I Love Who I AM"

I am so blessed to call this amazing young lady my daughter.  Her light is enormous and I am so proud of her for sharing it!

Reegan Gleave

My name is Reegan Gleave and i was born with Amniotic Band Syndrome. Amniotic Band Syndrome (ABS) is a congenital birth defect caused by the partial rupture of the amniotic sack. Fibrous bands float around in the amniotic fluid. These sticky bands can get wrapped around and trap limbs, cut off blood supply causing dead limbs, or a complete "natural" amputation. ABS is often difficult to detect before birth because the individual strands are small and hard to see in an ultrasound. I had my first surgery when i was 5 days old and had many through the years of my childhood.
As a parent of a child with ABS my parents felt many different emotions. At first shock because they had not seen any deformities besides my club foot in any ultrasounds. My mom felt so much guilt because she thought that she had somehow caused this. Sadness as they thought about all of the things that i wouldn't be able to do..none of which happened. They were so grateful because it didn't take my arms, legs, face, or my life...many don't survive pregnancy because the sack breaks. A lot of stress and worry during surgeries, but again grateful because I had the most amazing care. They also felt very prideful through the years because of how i have handled my disABILITY and how i taught my family and friends to be strong and brave.
Growing up i had no idea i was different. I had the most amazing parents and family who loved me so much and never ever treated me different. The day i went to my first day of head start i knew immediately that i was not like the rest of the students. I had difficulties writing and using my scissors. My teacher kept trying to make me write right handed and i remember being so frustrated because i am left handed. I always felt i was at the bottom of the class, and i had one major bully who would tease me until i cried. I told my aunt about the bully and she told me to go to school the next day and tell him that if he didn't stop my aunt was going to come to school and pull his underwear over his head. I said exactly that and he never again bullied me. One night i was sitting in my bed and i remember wondering when exactly i became weird or different, i didn't want to be seen that way. I had a stuffed dog that my uncle gave me and i would sit and talk to it like it was real. That night i told it that I am not stupid! I decided i wanted people to see the things that i could do instead of what i had a hard time doing.
In preschool i was the first person in my class to tie my own shoes, which is the first story my grandpa tells everyone about me. The students had gotten used to me and were really accepting me for the most part, surprisingly more than some adults. In second grade my family moved away, i had to go to a new school, try to make new friends, and answer new questions. I was so worried and so scared for my first day of school. My mom knew how terrified i was and I think secretly she was a little scared herself. So she came to school with me, walked me to my class, and asked my teacher if she could sit down and talk to the students for a moment. She explained what had happened to me and that i am just like everyone else. After she left my classmates completely accepted me and it was no big deal. I will forever be grateful for my moms courage to stand up for me. She set the example that i needed to always stand up for myself and not hide who i am.
Through the years of elementary school life was pretty easy i had an occasional bully but i got really good at shutting them down and walking away. Then came middle school and my peers became brutal. The kids would often make fun of me and call me "joystick" because they said my fingers looked like game controllers. That really hurt, I started feeling ugly, stupid, and handicapped. I felt like an exhibit in the zoo, People just stared at me like i was some kind of species that they had never heard of. I started fighting and eventually just ate lunch with the assisted principle.
My parents got divorced in the middle of my seventh grade year. We moved again. At my new school i tried really hard to blend in and just stick with myself so nobody would notice my hands. This period in my life was awful i was so down on myself constantly, but then a girl in school invited me to sit next to her in art class. She became my very best friend in the whole world, Jayden invited me to go to church with her, where her dad was the pastor, I started going often and I had never felt so accepted. Jayden literally saved my life.
Living with ABS has had its challenges and I've worried about so many things like, if a boy would notice my hands on a date, or I'd never be able to get my nails done, I wondered if I'd ever get married, and now i worry that my future children will be teased because of my differences.
I used to walk around with my hands in a fist and you would never see me in any kind of open toe shoes. At times i held myself back socially because i didn't think i was good enough. I started partying just to fit in with some kind of crowd. I finally began to really get it through my head that i was than that. I am worth so much more than partying and being down on myself. I began to pick up my pieces and put them back together. I learned that having a good sense of humor was the best way for me to cope with my hands and feet. I love to make up stories when people ask me what happened, my favorite is " I got bit by a shark." Thankfully i was born with a spit fire attitude and if you don't like me its your loss, if you tell me i can't do something i'll do it twice.
My name is Reegan Gleave and I am a survivor. After twenty years i finally love who I am. I am so thankful for all of my trials because each one has taught me something incredible. I've learned bullies are just sad and little on the inside and are scared of the light that I bring to this world. I've learned compassion, true friendship, love, and determination. I learned not to be a victim but to use my trials to make me stronger so that i can help bring hope and inspiration to peoples lives.
Living with ABS has been the biggest blessing I could have ever asked for, it has brought some amazing and loving people into my life. Especially my wonderful husband. It takes a very special man to be able to look past my differences and love me for who i really am on the inside and not care what anybody thinks about me. I am forever grateful for the unconditional love and support I get from him every single day. He has made me believe in myself and my beauty. He has given me the courage to show myself to people in a way I would have never done before.
My inspiration for sharing my story is that somewhere there is someone who felt like I did, and needs to know there is always hope and you are never alone.
Always let your light shine bright, God only gives his toughest battles to his strongest warriors.
I LOVE WHO I AM!!!!!

"A Light In the Darkness"

If I had a nickel for every time I am asked this question.....  Well I would have a lot of nickels!  "Do you ever get dark spirits?"  I have met so many people who say that they have experienced some form of darkness from the other side and have made the choice to shut off communication because they were afraid.

This is a very real and a very valid concern and one that I am so happy to teach about.  The lower vibrational world is very real and can be very present in our lives.  They like to remain in the darkness and even in writing this, I feel resistance....they do not like to be exposed, this sheds light on them and if we bring them into the light, we no longer fear them.  When we no longer fear, they become powerless.

I had many experiences growing up, both light and dark.  The darkness became just as real to me as the light.  I was terrified and asked for a blessing to block this kind of communication.  In doing that, I blocked a lot of the light communication as well.  In looking back, I am grateful that I was not allowed to open the doors to the extent that they are now.  I was just not spiritually and emotionally capable of handling the magnitude of this then.  Although the darkness stopped, I did miss the light communicators.  They were always there but I couldn't feel them in the same way.  At a very deep soul level, I missed them and I was lonely.

As I started doing more spiritual work and opening my gifts back up, I was very aware of the possibility of opening a portal to both sides.  I remembered the experiences I had when I was younger and realized that those experiences gave contrast.  I knew the importance of working only with the highest light.  It was a process of learning to shield and protect my spirit and the people I was working with so that only the lightness could be felt.  I worked very hard at this and focused a lot on "Not letting the darkness in, fighting the dark side."    It was exhausting!  At some level, I was operating out of fear and feeling the need to resist the low energy.  Then one day...the light turned on, literally.  I needed to experience light.  I, myself, did not understand that I truly was capable and deserving to work with the healing energy of Christ.  I saw only my darkness and realized that I was not fighting the darkness outside of me, but within.  The only way that I could really know Christ and allow that healing light to work through me, was to experience the healing first-hand, to surrender.  The merciful soul that he is, saw me as a beloved and allowed me to experience the light...complete, non-judgmental, unconditional loving light. I forget often....I am reminded daily.  I am appreciative beyond words.  The healing that God provides is unmatched in its completeness and can never be substituted or imitated by anything else.

But guess what,.....I would not have searched, I would not have surrendered, I would not have even known there was peace and joy at this level without the contrast of the dark experiences.  So in that, I am grateful.  You cannot ever "fight" the darkness.  It feeds off of "fight."  It feeds off of fear, doubts, insecurities, it loves the inner critic we often carry and grows in its influence.  Turn the light on.  You can never walk into a dark room and be upset enough to get the light to turn on ...the darkness added to darkness is still darkness.  Turn the light on by prayer, by calling on angels, by believing that the light is always more powerful then the darkness.  Light will always win!  Most importantly, love yourself!  Don't hate the darkness.  You cannot see the light of a candle or the beautiful stars shining without the darkness.  It gives us contrast and our job is to recognize it as such without giving it any more attention then that....turn on the light.

Here is the other thing I learned, when I made the choice to work only in the highest light and only in Christ centered healing, the darkness has become very small. It shows up when I am working with clients, only to be healed.  Interestingly enough, these low energy entities know that they have no presence here and that they will not be allowed to stay so only those who are seeking healing make themselves known.   And to go one step further, the loving energy of Christ's healing offers them direction as well.  Often times, we get to help guide  them to the light.

I feel inspired to share a recent experience.  I will admit, this was unnerving,  but it was such a great example of the contrast I am grateful it happened.  I was out of state doing a group session.  I am very careful to dedicate each session to healing and to only allow those who are working in the highest light to give messages.  We had a room full of people and messages were flowing in for people in the group, when all of the sudden, a man rushed in from the other side.  I could feel that he did not come alone he brought such a desperate energy that I could not move past him.  I asked him what he needed and he showed me a picture of walking back and forth on a dark rainy road.  He was pacing and was so upset, he said he did not understand what happened and he needed to talk.  Finally a lady recognized who this was.  He was a dear cousin of hers that had died unexpectedly and suspiciously.  She said that he had been on her mind constantly and she felt compelled to find some answers.  He gave me the feeling of betrayal and showed that their were other people present in his death.  He also said, "cloudy mind."  I was not comfortable with his presence and asked if I could talk to him later and help him with some healing.  Still, he would not leave and his presence was so strong.  I again asked him to leave and he did step back but I could still feel his desperation.  I could not move past it and was unable to continue with messages for other people.  I asked the angels and God to clear the room and fill it with light so that we could continue.  The energy lightened and I was somewhat able to continue, knowing, however that he was waiting.  When the session was over, needless to say, I was disturbed.  This had never happened.  The spirits I worked with were always so peaceful and healing.  I prayed for help in being able to help him in the highest light.  I decided to have his sweet cousin meet with me privately the next day.  She was more then happy to do this. 

We met the next day and I had taken extra measures and had asked for all available help in making sure this would be a loving, healing experience for everyone involved.  As we began, this man came back into the room with a completely different presence.  He was actually wearing a tie and winked at her saying,  "I'll behave this time."  He also said that his cousin here had already done so much work for him by praying and sending him light.  She said that she had talked to him all night and had asked for his family members on the other side to greet him.  He then started to show me pictures of a woman putting pills in his mouth.  He gave me the feeling of confusion and not being aware of what was really going on around him.  He then gave me the feeling that he was very afraid to face his father on the other side.  Apparently, this woman who had given him pills was a girlfriend who had been taking care of him and managing his medications.  He trusted her so much that he had, just prior to his passing, willed his entire family estate, including the family farm, to her.  His cousin confirmed that they had suspected this.  The autopsy report showed that he had an excessive amount of blood pressure medications, causing his death.  Interestingly enough, this man was not worried about justice or blame for his suspected "murder."  His only concern was in facing his father.  He actually had not crossed over into the light completely because of his fear of disappointing his father.  We talked to him and asked if we could help him be able to do this with the help of Christ and he agreed.  As soon as he agreed, he was greeted by his mother and a room full of angels.  I saw them clear a path so that he could walk to his father.  He walked forward with his head down, full of shame and humility.  As he approached his father, I saw his dad grab him and hug him and tell him that everything was okay.  He said that the family farm had consumed him and he did not want him, or anyone else to have to carry that burden any longer.  As this man experienced the acceptance from his father, the light rushed in.  It was the most intense love and we could feel the instant healing that this sweet man experienced.  He was so emotional and grateful for the work his cousin had done for him.  She was very tearful and could feel the peace that her cousin was feeling.  He told her that they had a "soul contract" and that she had agreed to help him through this experience and he was eternally grateful.

I will admit, this experience rocked me a bit.  I was shaken by the force at which this soul wanted healing.  Apparently, he was this persistent in the physical world.  But we learned so much.  We witnessed the contrast in the most dramatic way.  His cousin and I felt the desperation and the equal measure of peace and joy that came on the other end of the spectrum.  It was amazing!

 I often teach people how to allow gifts to open safely and I am going to list some of the things that have worked for me.  It is important to find what resonates with you and be consistent about it. 

Clear the space around you.  I do this with either sage or sage oil.  I clear it out with the intent that only the highest light is allowed to be in it.  Also, open a window and keep love in your heart while clearing the space.  

I also say often, "In the name of Jesus Christ, I command all unholy, impure, or less useful spirits to depart.  Depart from this planet and this universe as well and go to the light." (I don't want to send them to another person on the planet...I want them to experience healing in the light.)

I then ask for protection from angels, Heavenly Father, Heavenly Mother, and Jesus Christ.  Ask whomever resonates with you...even if you ask for spirits of light to protect you, it's all about intent.  Archangels are very powerful protectors, especially Archangel Michael, we can all call on them we need extra help.  You can also place protection over your children because you have stewardship over them.  Praying for your loved ones and asking for protection for them provides that also. 

Feel confident that you are protected and dedicate your work, meditation, day, or whatever it is, to the highest light. Not only does the light repel the dark, but working in the healing light of Christ actually transcends negative energy to healing energy and love. 

I love oils!  I feel that they really help to attract higher vibrational energies.

Focus on the light!  Whatever you feed will grow.  Stay in a place of love and surround yourself with that energy in your home, your car, your work......wherever you spend your time.

Relax and be happy.  Focus on gratitude.  It is one of the highest vibrational energies and fear cannot exist in the same realm.

Know that we get to set the boundaries.  If we are feeling overwhelmed or depleted, know that we can set an intention of the work that we can do. There have been times when I have said, "I can only help 2 spirits a day."  They respect your boundaries and your angels and guides will teach you what your boundaries need to feel like.

One of the most important lessons I have learned, is to trust Christ.  To recognize that I am not doing the healing, therefore, I cannot hold the emotions of the experience once the healing is done.  Believe me, I have tried.  We have to continually surrender the emotions and give it to a higher power.  It is a show of trust and faith when we are able to do this and allows us to truly be a vessel, working as a partner with God in healing each other.

Last but not least, know that we are all vessels.  We are just made that way.  We are carriers of energy and the beautiful part is that we get to choose!  We all have EQUAL access to the love from source.  Our job is to surrender any emotions or belief that we are less then deserving of that.  We are ONE.  We are all the light, we are all the love, WE ARE ALL ONE WITH DIVINITY.  The only thing more scary then sensing the darkness is feeling nothing at all.  "Fear not, for they that be with us are more then they that be with them." 

This was kind of a long post but I hope it helps to shed some "light" on the subject!  I would love comments.  Let us know what has worked for you!  Lots of love to you all!  (Thank you my friend, for letting me share your story, you are amazing!) 
  
 



  

"Why Are Bad Things Allowed To Happen?"

This is a subject that comes up almost everyday.  Adversity in all things....It's a statement that is often hard to hear but as I am doing this work, I am understanding the loving intent of this universal law. 

I had a beautiful young lady come to see me recently.  I was impressed with her quiet, graceful presence.  She was so kind and open-hearted.   As we started into our session, I felt the presence of her father who had passed away when she was a young girl.  He was so anxious to let her know that he was near her and I felt him just wanting to hold and comfort her.  She was so emotional and I could hear the words, "Dad I've missed you so much."  He spoke of many specific incidences that he had walked beside her in her journey.  He spoke of her children and knew each child's personality.  He just wanted her to know that he had never abandoned her. 

After many laughs and lots of tears, her dad, very gently, brought up a sensitive experience in which this sweet woman had been mistreated by a family member.  She became very tearful and said, "Yes, I was sexually abused."  "Was my dad there to help me?"  "Did he try to stop it?"   Immediately I could feel her father start to cry.  I saw a picture of him being in the situation with her, begging to be able to change this for her.  I saw him crying out to the angels, "Please help her, please stop it!"  I then saw a picture of Christ, lovingly, holding them back and comforting this sweet lady.  He said, "This is an experience that she agreed to and even asked for to teach her what she wanted to learn in this life.  As I saw the Savior speak these words, I felt the sadness that HE was understanding and saw the tears in HIS eyes.  He truly understood the pain that this caused and in understanding the pain, he knew how to personally comfort both this woman and her father while still allowing her to experience agency. 

I have seen countless experiences where angels have surrounded those who are experiencing a tragedy or an illness.  I have seen accidents where the soul was able to separate from the body so that the pain and fear of the dying experience was not felt by the person.  One thing that is common in all heartache....  God is merciful and the depth at which the pain is felt is equal to the joy and enlightenment that will come with healing. 

I have been working with another family over the past few months.  They have suffered an unimaginable loss of their 12 year old boy.  He was taken in an automobile accident in a very public, shocking incident with a school bus.  He was with many other children but was the only one that passed away.  In one of the first sessions I did with his family, I saw a picture of the accident happen and the body of this sweet boy gently lifted up and laid down by angels on both sides of him.  It gave so much comfort to his family, knowing that even in death, his little body was cared for like his parents would. 

It has been almost a year since his passing and I was able to do a session for them again a few weeks ago.  The first picture that I saw as we opened our session, was this young man standing on the sidelines of a football game.  He then knelt down as if to honor the boys playing on the field.  I then saw him stand up and turn around and start waving to his parents in the stands.  He wanted me to point out the fact that he was wearing a jersey.  As I told his parents this image,  They both started to cry.  His dad said, "We have been going to every high school football game in our little town.  We cheer as loud as we can to honor those boys because we will not get the chance to see our son in a uniform and he loved football!"  He said, "We tell all the parents to cheer just as loud as you can because you don't always get that chance." 

This sweet son was showing them that he was with them in honoring the football team and that he was, in fact, wearing a jersey!  I have seen a little bit of what this family has been through in the grieving process and I am so very impressed with the way they are sharing their son's story and touching countless lives around them.  They spend their time comforting others who have lost children and they have recently made the decision to return to the religious affiliation that they had left before their son passed.  They are passionate about sharing his story and spreading his light from this side. They say that they can see him working from the other side and he is bringing so much love and awareness to their community. 

There are so many stories I could share regarding this subject but one thing I have come to know is that there is always purpose in the pain.  We asked in this lifetime to experience, to understand all things.  Those who have taken the most difficult experiences were those that wanted to evolve the fastest.  I believe, that those who have taken the most pain, also asked to really be able to understand the love that God has for us.  How can we truly understand the depth of that love without having to experience the healing when the healing can come no other way.   The deeper you experience the darkness, the more expansive you will experience the light.  It's always so amazing to me to see the way in which people move forward in their grieving and help others open up to a higher power.  Perhaps these powerful souls on the other side can do so much more for us there then they can here.

When you are experiencing deep pain, don't be afraid to feel it.  Let it work through you.  Let the "refiner's fire" burn through the blockages and the walls that we have created.  Ask to understand why you are feeling this and what you need to learn from it.  When you feel that you are ready, release the emotions to the light.  Christ is always ready and willing to take our pain to the light and replace it with the purest form of love and peace.  We all deserve to experience this and as you taste the sweetness of healing, you will want to share.

 I have been understanding the term "Atonement" in a more personal way in this work.  AT ONE MENT means that we are all united in healing each other.  The healing comes with each one of us sharing our love and unique gifts.  God works through each one of us and there is a "shift" happening.  People are awakening and asking to be instruments of healing for others.  I am seeing it more everyday. People say all the time that they are feeling "called" to something more.  It is time to do the work necessary to heal from past pain and step into the gifts that we all posses. I believe that returning to "Christ Consciousness" means merging our worlds as one.  I am feeling impressed to do more classes on helping people open up to this.  I will be holding one in October so watch for that information on my healing connections page.  Thank you to all the amazing....AMAZING people who have allowed me to step into their grief with them and share messages of hope that only their loved ones can give.  Thank you for letting me share your stories!  So much love and light to you all!

Do Those Who Commit Suicide Go to "Hell?"

With all the recent discussion about suicide and the passing of Robin Williams, I felt inspired to write about my experiences with suicide in my work with the souls who have actually passed in this way.

This is a difficult subject to write about and is always a tender experience when I work with families who have endured this loss.  The emotions that they are left to sort through is layered so incredibly deep.  They not only have the loss to deal with but also the questions of why, and almost always, a tremendous amount of guilt.  "If I could have only done more."

I can usually tell right away when I feel a soul who has passed in this way because they often feel very "heavy."  They usually are hesitant in coming forward or they are assisted to come forward by someone on the other side who is full of light.  The other way that I often feel them, is very relieved.  They usually say to me right off, "I have finally found peace."  Those who have peace say that they have become one with God.  Many times I sense them as very old wise spirits who came to bring light to the earth but were unable to feel like they were at home here in this dense energy on earth.  They tell me all the time, "I was so homesick."  I have come to believe that we arrange pre-soul contracts.  We decided what lessons we would like to learn and what people we would like to have in our lives to help us experience those lessons.  Sometimes souls agree to take very intense, hard contracts so that they can evolve more rapidly.  Many times, these people are the "shock absorbers" of the world and come with the most tender of hearts, agreeing to carry the burdens of others to bring love to the earth.  I believe this is what Robin Williams was.  Someone who gave light to all and absorbed the pain around him. 

So here lies the question, "Do those who commit suicide go to hell?"  My first response to this is that I no longer believe that hell is actually a place.  I feel it is a state of being and we all experience our own hell in our own way.  In some cases I do believe that those who have ended their lives are in their own hell.  I am convinced though that this state of being is not from an angry God who wants to punish them for their actions.  I feel that it comes from the self-judgement that they are facing in making that decision, and the fact that they are eternally connected to those loved ones who are left.  They heal together and they feel each others emotions because they are energetically one.  We are all connected but those who are family will feel it more intensely. Many times these souls will take the opportunity in our sessions to help their loved ones understand why they made that decision and why it was not the responsibility of others to fix it.  They will also, almost always, plead for forgiveness.

I did a session for a mother a while back in which her young teenage daughter committed suicide unexpectedly.  It absolutely destroyed her mother almost to the point that she wanted to do the same thing.  I felt her daughter so very close in our session.  She was holding hands with her mom and said that she was going through every single emotion with her.  She felt her pain, she cried her tears, and she loved her in a deeper way then she ever felt was possible in her physical life.  She said, "Mom, no pressure, no hurry, but I can't heal unless you do."  We are in this together.  I then did a session for her dad a few years later, and not knowing until after that this was the same soul, she said the same thing.  She was feeling all the emotions that her dad was experiencing as well.

I have also had a few experiences where I felt the soul, on the other side, very heavy and feeling "lost."  One in particular, was a session where I felt a young man come forward.  He felt like he was wandering, just walking back and forth with his hands in his pocket like he was unaware of where he was but also feeling alone and sad.  My client said that he had a friend who had taken his own life and that he had been feeling his presence around him almost everyday.

I have come to learn that their are "lost souls" on the other side just like here in the physical world.  They seem to be very attached to people here on earth and try to draw energy from us in our physical form.  I believe that when people see ghosts, they are often seeing earth bound souls.  I believe that they are often "asleep" and unaware that there is a higher light that can help them heal and be whole again.

In this session with this young man,  I asked my client if he wanted to help this soul to feel love again and to be able to experience the light so that he could make the choice to surrender to that higher light.  I asked him to focus as much love and light to his friend to to send prayers for any "light" souls from the other side to help this young man feel the healing love of God.  We were both silently praying when I felt another young man walk forward and stand next to this young man.  He was also a friend of my clients and a friend of the lost young man.  He had passed in his early 20's of an aneurysm and was such a great guy.  He took the young man by the hand and asked him to go with him.  The young man agreed.  Instantly I could feel a sense of peace and surrender from this young man.  He was suddenly surrounded by light and love and I saw a "blanket of peace" being wrapped around him by the Savior.   This was such a beautiful experience and my client was very emotional.  It also taught us both, the power that we have in helping to heal each other, even those on the other side.  It is all about LOVE.  Sometimes we forget our own light and we feel lost.  Many times we find our way again through others who are shining their light. 

I recently had a session with a family member of a sweet lady who had taken her own life very unexpectedly.  She came forward so strong and her presence filled the entire room.  She said, she had finally found peace.  She also said that her mission on earth was to bring  a higher level of love to the earth and to raise vibrations for all around her.  She had suffered from a chemical depression but also shared that she had carried a very big "pack" behind her.  She showed me a picture of picking up stones.  Each stone had a label on it.  She showed me ones that said, I am dumb, I am too fat, I am not capable.  They were all symbolic of very destructive thoughts.  She then showed  me all the stones she had picked up for everyone else.  She said that the pack became so heavy, the only way she knew to take it off was to cut it off.  She said that she could see from a higher perspective now and see that she could have released them along the way and not had to endure so much pain.  She also said that she had paid her dues on earth and that she finally understood how much God really loved her and understood her pain.  She felt very desperate to help her other family members who also suffered from depression to look at other ways to release the "stones."  She had, in her desperate decision, changed the course of her family's life forever.  They now understood the seriousness of this disease and were willing to do whatever it took to heal this for generations past and generations to come.  The chain was being broken! 

I hope this sheds some light on suicide and I hope to impress upon all of you who read this, you can make a difference in this world and the other.  Send your healing light and love to all around you and all who are in need of healing on the other side.  We are in this together!  I believe that God is merciful and and no soul is truly ever lost. My most sincere prayers go out to those who are left here to grieve and ask why....I pray you are able experience the depth of love and understanding that God wants to give you and can find the courage to surrender to the understanding that there is always a way back home. 

"The Red Rose"

I really had a hard time deciding which story to write this week.  There are always so many inspirational messages to choose from.  I really pray about it and ask to choose a message that will benefit the most readers.  As I was contemplating this, I came across a picture that interestingly enough, I had seen exactly in a session I was doing for a man who was struggling with relationship problems...so there was my answer.  Hope you enjoy!!

He came to me with such a positive attitude and a sincere desire to improve the relationship he had been in for over 7 years.  He was a very ambitious, driven man and is very successful in the world of politics.  He felt that the government could be run honestly and justly and that he could make a real difference for the people he served.  He and his wife had experienced many ups and downs and had three beautiful children.  He expressed how much he loved his wife and that his family was his everything.  He had grown up without a father in his home and he was determined that his children would not experience the same thing.  He said that when he was dating, he met so many positive, amazing people and he carefully chose the woman he married.  He stated that although he loved her, she was not the woman he married.  She was often sad, insecure and negative.  He felt very frustrated about this.  He said that he was constantly trying to build her up and encourage her to keep her thoughts positive.  He said that she often felt like she didn't even know who she was anymore.  He said, "Did I make the right choice in choosing her?"

First of all I feel that we are always exactly where we need to be to learn the lessons and have the experiences we asked to have.  Sometimes I think we take the "long road" to learn what we need to when the spiritual path will always get us where we need to be quicker.  But, we asked for experiences here in the physical world and that is what we are receiving.  

I invited anyone who would like to assist this man in his question and immediately I saw a picture of a field of white roses.  In the middle of the roses was one red rose that was taller and more beautiful then the rest.  It obviously stood out.  I saw an image of him walking over to the red rose and admiring it for a while.  He smelled it and finally decided to pick it.  I then saw him walking down a path carrying that red rose.  He held it close to him and never set it down.  I then noticed that the further down the path he got, the flower started to wilt.  I saw him trying to hold the rose more upright and keep the stem strong but the longer he held the rose, the more wilted and discolored it became.  

The message came to me as I explained this picture to him, that he obviously noticed her beauty and was attracted to her in the beginning.  She stood out taller and more vibrant then the rest.  That is why he chose her.  But somewhere in that journey she had allowed herself to be removed from the "nourishing soil" or source that she grew so beautifully in before.  She had become an attachment of him and her children and was no longer growing emotionally and spiritually like she had before.  He, being the fixer, thought that if he could just encourage her enough or hold her up tall enough, she would feel like the beautiful rose she once was.   He was so frustrated that she could not see this and even more upset that he couldn't make her see it.  

The message came to me...."You have to plant her back in the soil."  "You have to set her down and allow her to walk her own path.  You can give her love and "sunlight, you can shower her with compliments but as long as she is removed from the source, her center, her connection with her own divinity, she will continue to wilt."  He said, I don't know how.  I said, "You will.   Pray about what SHE needs to be able to grow.  Also, she can energetically feel when you are frustrated with her which feeds her already lacking self-esteem.  Tell her she is capable, encourage her to have "her" time.  Compliment who she is not just what she looks like or what she does for you.  Help her remember what she felt like when she was the beautiful, confident, healthy red rose." 

I feel like this is a message that comes up often, especially for women.  It is so important that we stay connected to our source and allow ourselves time to just breath throughout the day.  The gathering of our energy comes back to us in the quiet still moments when we are able to listen to a loving Father who wants nothing more then to remind us that we are the "RED ROSE."

"I've Waited 17 Years To Know My Baby Is Ok"

I will give you fair warning...this one is a tear jerker!  I just loved this session!  I am grateful for the divine intervention that allowed this one to take place because this needed to happen. 

This was a recent session where two sisters and their mother came to see me.  It was really a matter of fate because I was completely booked and had someone reschedule just prior to this woman making an appointment.  I am learning that this work is so divinely orchestrated, I can only imagine all that is taking place on the other side, coordinating schedules and arranging meetings for everyone to receive the guidance and comfort they need.  It has to be a full time job!

We started our session and a few family members made their presence known.  They gave messages of healing and comfort.  Then a lady came forward, she was beautiful.  She felt very angelic and loving.  She gave me a feeling of such motherly nurturing.  I could feel her intense love for this family and her appreciation  the friendship they shared in the physical world.  She mentioned many of the funny things that they were able to do together in her life experience.  She had been a very close friend and was taken from this world unexpectedly.  She left a husband and children behind which she made it known, had been very hard on her.  She spoke of her family and pointed out all of the interactions and guidance she was still able to give them.  She then started talking specifically to one of the sisters in our session.  Her name was Jana.

She directed her energy at Jana and showed me that she was holding a little boy.  He appeared to be about 3 years old.  His name was Colten.  He was absolutely beautiful and very much a lively little boy.  She then showed me a picture of him sitting down on a seat and she was putting his little shoes on his wiggly feet.  He was having a hard time sitting still and this woman was gently putting on his socks with a great big smile on her face.  She gave me the feeling of peace and appreciation in being able to do this for him.  I asked Jana what this meant and by this time she was sobbing.  She said, "That's my little boy.  He passed away 17 years ago when he was only 3 years old."  I then saw a picture of a car and angels lifting the car up,  I asked Jana if Colten was in a car accident.  She said, "Yes, his dad accidentally ran over him in the car.  Colten said, "Mom the angels lifted the car off of me, I didn't feel it."  He said, "I am safe, I made it home okay."  Jana was choking back her sobs, she said, "I'VE WAITED 17 YEARS TO KNOW MY BABY IS OK."    Then Colten said, "Please tell daddy I know that he didn't mean to, I try to tell him everyday.  Tell him that I know that he loves me."  Jana said that her husband had such a difficult time with this accident and would be so thankful to know that.  She also said that when her dear friend passed away she was so sad but she felt comforted in knowing that she would be able to help take care of her Colten.  Colten then talked about his siblings and knew each one of them and their personalities.  He made it very clear that he was aware of all that was going on in their family and did not want to miss a thing.  He also gave me a feeling that he was a very old, experienced soul but that he would, "be small" until his mother had the chance to experience raising him.

Jana asked if Colten was proud of what she had accomplished in her life since his passing.  He told me that she became a nurse after his passing.  He took a lot of credit for directing her and his aunt who was present also, in becoming nurses.  He gave me a feeling of he himself, having an interest in medical information and that he "whispered" the knowledge and the guidance that they needed to help take care of other people.  He told me that he was able to continue his light here on earth through them and that together they were making a difference for many people.  He talked about how much he loved his family and gave specific messages for his aunt and for his grandma in the session.  He said that he was free like a butterfly and was grateful to not be in a "cocoon" anymore.  He could explore and fly and more then anything, share his great big light without the confines of a body.  He was pure love and peace and filled the room with joy!

Jana, her sister, and their mother left saying that they felt so much comfort in knowing that Colten wasn't alone and that he did not suffer in his passing.  It was such an honor to meet with them and I pray the healing continues.  So many years had passed and I was impressed with way that all of them were able to face their grief and become better in their lives instead of bitter.  They wanted to make a difference in the name of Colten and they have!  So inspirational!  Thank you for letting me share your story!  You are amazing!

"Can I Please Take Out the Block Called Abandonment?"

I am a little behind on my blogging so I apologize to all of you who have been following this.  It's been so busy and I am so very grateful to be able to share this work with more and more people.  I love it!!!  There are so many stories to write about and every experience with every person is different.  I realized about 6 months ago that this needed to be more then just connection to the other side.  This is about healing....deep down soul healing.  Not just healing with words, but healing with our loved ones on the other side and more importantly, healing our relationship with God, learning to trust the love and acceptance we deserve.  I started inviting and acknowledging the Savior in every session that I do and my work has completely changed.  Every session amazes me and I consider myself  the "observer" in that experience.  I am constantly in awe at the miracles that take place.  I am often in tears myself....so completely humbled to be a witness to the beautiful souls I am allowed to work with.  That being said, I would like to share a story of healing that came about this week.  Her name was Melissa and she is a beautiful person!  Her father on the other side kept telling her so!

Melissa came to me and I could instantly feel that she was such a kind sweet person.  She was very open.  I could also really sense some insecurity and sadness.  The words kept coming to me, "Am I Enough?"  I start each session with a short prayer and bless her heart, she was crying before we even started.  She was carrying a heavy burden!

I often receive my messages through pictures.  They show me movies and sometimes they are literal pictures but more often then not, they are symbolic representations, almost like parables.  One of the first pictures I received for Melissa was of her standing in front of a handcart.  She was standing alone at the front trying to pull the handles with all her strength.  I saw an image of her looking around and seeing that she was completely alone trying to pull this cart up a hill.  I also saw that in the back of the cart were a pile of blocks.  They were big square blocks. Each one had a label on it.  I could see different words on each block like, "sad," "fear," "alone," "grief," pain," "ABANDONMENT."  I asked her as she started to cry, if she knew why these blocks were in her cart.  She said Yes. She had suffered the loss of some loved ones and she felt that she was very alone in her marriage and her family relationships.  She felt that she had a hard time trusting that people loved her and wanted to be in her life.  She also felt that nobody truly understood her.
 I then saw a picture of her looking back at the cart and seeing it and herself surrounded by angels and loved ones on the other side.  I then felt the very strong presence of a grandmother with her asking Melissa if she could trust that she was not pulling that cart alone.  She validated how heavy the cart was and told her that she could see all the blocks.  She asked if she and the other loved ones could help empty out the cart and replace it with love and healing so that it would be lighter to carry.  Melissa agreed to this.

There was so much symbolism in this story.  First of all, I felt that the handcart represented her pioneer heritage and the fact that so many before her had struggled.  They knew exactly how to help and comfort her.  It symbolized Melissa's strength in having carried the cart as far as she had. The fact that they were shaped in blocks was interesting because she was truly feeling "blocked" from receiving love from others because of the pain she was holding.  She didn't believe she deserved it.  She was given an invitation to really meditate and talk to her guides and angels and ask for direction in healing these wounds.  They also told her that visualization and intention is so powerful and that all she had to do was to ask for help with the intention and faith that she could feel love and healing. 

I then felt the presence of her father who had passed away when she was very young.  She had some memories of her father but her heart ached for him.  She felt such a hole in her heart when he passed away unexpectedly.  He gave her so many validating messages but one part was especially sweet.  He showed me a picture of himself kneeling down next to her and kissing her on the forehead every single night of her life.  He said, "I have never left you.   I have kissed you goodnight every night since that day and I will keep doing it for the rest of your life."  He also told her that she had been looking into a "broken mirror" and that she had forgotten how beautiful she was.  He said, "You have lost yourself."  She was very emotional and said that she did feel lost.  He then showed me a picture of going back to the back of the handcart and picking up a block.  He said, "If I promise to be with you every single day, CAN I PLEASE TAKE OUT THE BLOCK CALLED ABANDONMENT? Can you trust me when I tell you I am never leaving?"  Melissa took a deep breath and agreed to let her father take the block. She visualized him taking it and throwing it far away.  It took a moment, but Melissa said, "Ah that feels better!"  He also promised that he would remind her, everyday, how beautiful she was and how loved and supported she was from both sides.

Melissa was given some visualizations and some affirmations to do to "create" and "allow" the support she needed.  She was also urged to give herself permission to ask for what she needed and know that she deserved love in return.  Melissa was very intuitive and they told her that the more she learns to trust that voice of guidance, the stronger it would become, leading her to all the healing her soul was in need of. 

"THINGS DONT HAPPEN TO US, THEY HAPPEN FOR US"

I have been posting mainly just the messages that come from the sessions that I do because I feel like there are so many amazing things that they teach us.  I often leave out a lot of the session because of the amount of information given and because most of it is personal to the person I am meeting with.  I recently had a session  though that I was blown away from beginning to end.  The messages were so healing and so detailed that I am going to write about the whole experience.  To protect anonymity, I will change the names as well as some of the circumstances that may identify this person. 

This man, by the name of Dave, was having an extremely difficult time because of a recent accident he was involved in where two men were killed.  His girlfriend was concerned about him and made an appointment for him to come see me.  This guy was a big burly guy but so gentle and kind.  Right at the beginning of our session, I could feel his grandfather's presence.  He was a very big spirit and filled the room with love.  He came to Dave in a gentle but powerful way and showed me a picture of him sitting Dave down, like a little boy.  He then showed me a picture of Dave standing in a room with people around him.  I heard the words, "He is in need of healing."  I then saw Dave looking at each one of these people and saying, "I'll take their pain, I'll take their pain, he was essentially "signing" up to try and take the pain of many of those around him.  Dave agreed to this and said that he often felt responsible to make other people's burden lighter, even if it made his heavier.  His grandpa had a great sense of humor and talked about a lot of the things they did together when Dave was young.  He had us all laughing.  He then got very serious and said, "Dave, I have two friends that I would like to bring to talk to you.  It might be difficult for you but I think it will help you have some healing, is that okay?"  Dave said yes...

Dave's grandpa walked away for a moment and came back with two young men.  They had the biggest smiles on their faces.  They were both wearing white shirts and gave me the impression that they were "companions," working together to teach about the Savior from the other side.  They said that they were at peace with their passing and that they did not feel any impact in the accident.  They also showed me that the "light changed."  Dave validated this and said that they had run a red light.  They asked Dave, "Why are you still looking at the vehicle?  I asked Dave if he still had the truck that was in the accident, and he said no but that he had pictures of it and he looked at them every day.  They asked him to replace those pictures with one of a  beautiful road, lined with trees.  They said that was their experience in crossing over, just continuing down a new road that was absolutely beautiful!  They told him that their time on earth was finished and that he had actually taken the hardest part of that contract in having to be the one to serve in their passing.  They validated his pain and thanked him for allowing them to continue in their mission and said they would continue to comfort him through this trial. 

They then walked away for a moment and returned holding the hands of a little boy.  I told Dave about this and he just started sobbing.  Dave had a three month old son pass away about 10 years ago.  He was so heartbroken about this little boy and had never fully recovered.  These two men said that they would watch over this sweet boy until his dad could have the chance to raise him.  This little boy told his dad how much he loved him and that he would be waiting for him on the other side.  He wasn't going to "grow up without his dad."  He then said that there was something his dad had that had his name on it and it made him happy.  Dave had a tattoo with his son's ashes and name on his arm.  His son said that he loved him and then he pointed to another little boy standing there with him.  I heard the words "Brother."  Again, Dave was emotional.  He said that his ex-wife had an abortion and didn't tell him until later.  He always felt that it was a boy.  This validated for him that his sons were together and were best friends.  Also, that they were waiting for him so that he could experience raising them.

His grandfather then came back and he showed me a picture of fire and said the words "beauty."  I asked Dave if this meant anything to him and he said, Yes..my grandpa used to make a fire for me on a fireproof tarp on top of the houseboat.  He would say, boy, a fire, a boat, and a sunset...now that's a thing of beauty!"
He then said, "I want you to imagine that fire Dave and I want you to put that fire back inside of you because boy, YOU ARE A THING OF BEAUTY."    His grandfather then kept drawing my attention to Dave's necklace.  He said, "That represents you!  He gave me the impression that it was part of Dave finding his purpose.  Dave pulled it out from under his shirt and showed my that it was a phoenix.  He said that he had the words, "Out Of  the Ashes We Rise."  His grandpa talked about Dave working with youth and being a drug counselor.  He said that was something he always wanted to do. Dave said that he always loved the phoenix and felt that no matter what challenges he faced he could always rise. 

Dave was given validation on so many things in his life and hopefully reassured that his suffering had meaning, that there is always purpose in the pain he had to endure.  As we were ending our session, I kept hearing a saying, "THINGS DON'T HAPPEN TO US THEY HAPPEN FOR US."  As I told this to Dave, he wept.  His aunt who had been like a second mother to him use to say this to him all the time.  She had passed away from a brain tumor and did not want to miss the chance to give him this message one more time.  

I love this work so much and I am so grateful for the beautiful words of healing we can have!  God is so merciful!  Dave, you are an inspiration. Lot's of love and prayers for you to be able to find all the peace you deserve.  Thank you for letting me share your story.

"Baby Jonathon"

This has been an interesting story to write.  I actually started writing the story this morning but I kept having things come up and I was unable to finish it throughout the day.  I now understand the reason why I had to wait and I am so excited to share this message.  It is always so interesting to me the way that spirit works and how  they are validated from all angles.  It truly is mind blowing sometimes to be a part of this work.

I had a family come to see me recently.  They received many healing messages from their loved ones but they asked specifically about a baby boy named Johnathon who had passed a few months ago and was a very good friend of the family.  This sweet little spirit came through and validated so many points for them.  He immediately showed me that when he he crossed over, he was greeted by a grandfather.  He showed me a picture of his grandfather with his arms wide open.  They validated that Johnathon was actually laid to rest in the same grave as his grandfather.  Johnathon said that he was given a choice to stay or go back and that his mission here in the physical world was complete.  He said that his body was perfect and that he passed in his sleep.  This family validated this and said that the autopsy report showed nothing was wrong with his little body.  He was perfect. 

This special spirit said that he had an older brother who was very steadfast and grounded and that he was a very wise soul.  He said that he moves very fast and that Jonathon whispers in his ear.  He said that the only time his brother could really hear him was at night because everything else was quiet.  This woman gasped and said that Jonathon's brother, who is 8, often plugs his ears and says that he can hear a baby crying.  It actually was alarming to him but he could hear it during the night.  I had a sense that this little boy is very gifted and does have an openness to spirit.  He was also diagnosed with A.D.H.D. and does move "very fast."  I then saw a picture of a young girl who was Johnathon's sister, she appeared to be about 13.  I could feel that she was also very spiritually open and that she had seen spirits throughout her life.  This family said that it was all accurate and they left feeling comforted regarding this terrible loss. 

I actually started writing this story about gifted children, but like I said, it was difficult to finish...I have felt impressed throughout the day to write about the fact that all children are gifted.  All children are naturally more open and accepting of spiritual experiences.  They don't question the validity and until adults question that, they believe everything they feel to be truth.  People ask me how to open up their spiritual gifts??  Become more childlike.  Take down the walls, trust yourself, know that you deserve to be in tune with your inspiration.  Let go of guilt, anger, shame, anything that holds you down and most importantly, GET HAPPY!  Allow yourself to feel again and let the inspiration flow through you without resistance.  Let go, relax, and trust!

So, the rest of the story.....and the reason I couldn't finish until tonight.  I had a mother and a young boy come to me today.  I knew only her first name.  As I began our session, I immediately saw a baby wrapped up in a blue blanket being handed to this mother.  I gasped....I said, "Are you Jonathon's mother?"  She started crying and I could feel this perfect little angel once again there to comfort his loved ones.  He was so majestic, I felt that he actually had to dim his vibrational energy to have an earthly experience.  He validated many points that she felt and told her that his mission was to bring a higher vibration to this earth.  He had done that and his mother reported that hundreds of people said that they were touched by this baby.  He Just had "something special about him."  Johnathon talked about dragonflies and told her that she would always see them in numbers.  Never one alone, and he wanted her to know that it would remind her of all the angels and the loved ones around her.  She validated that she was seeing dragonflies everywhere!  He talked about how he whispers in his brother's ear.  His brother said that it sounds like "Swords rubbing together for just a moment but then it sounds like a baby."  We talked about how the other side moves much quicker and sometimes the sounds are hard to understand.  I told him to never be afraid and to know that his brother is just letting him know he is there.  Jonathon then said that a miracle happened, and then he showed me a picture of his mother looking at his casket.  She was emotional about this and said that the day of his funeral, she was looking into the casket and asked for a sign, for God to let her know that her baby boy was okay, to let her know that he was with God.  When she got in her car right after, she looked up and saw a brilliantly colored rainbow where there was not one before.  She felt that this was the answer that she needed. 

This woman then had a very close friend who had passed away a few years ago come forward.  He made me feel like he had trauma to his head.  He let her know that he did not suffer and he said the words, "Lights out."  She validated that he had been shot in the head and that she had hoped he did not suffer.  She was so relieved to know that his passing was instant.  He then said that he had her "dog tags."  She said, "Oh my gosh, I have a letter in my car right now that he wrote me while he was living.  It said, I still have your dog tags you gave me."  She had given him her tags after serving in the military and he was so honored that she would choose him to give them to.  She said that the letter she had stated that exactly.  He told her that he loved her and he was with her and that he was watching over her sweet baby. 

I usually try to point out a message in my sessions but I think the point here is that we are never alone.  Our loved ones are never really gone and what a blessing it is to know that we can be comforted by them personally!  I am humbled to have been a part of this experience and to feel this heavenly soul.  I pray for healing in the days ahead for this beautiful family. 

"I Saw the Opportunity to Jump From the Swing and I Had To Take It!"

This was from a recent session for an amazing family who came to see me from Idaho.  I was so excited to meet with them and could feel that they had a daughter on the other side all morning on the day of their session.  I could feel that she was so excited to talk to her family!  She had such a big spirit and was so happy!  She was an energy that I wanted to stay with me all day!

Her family arrived and brought with them, a cute little dog.  They informed me that they were taking him back to Idaho but asked if he could be in the session with us.  I said absolutely.  I have learned in this work, how important animals are.  I feel that they are also "Mediums" and can give us messages and healing energy as we need it on this side.

Immediately in the session, this sweet daughter came through and was so excited to communicate with her loved ones.  She expressed so much love and gratitude to her family and validated specific events in which she had been with them in spirit.  It was interesting, whenever this daughter was communicating, the dog would go crazy.  He would run all over the room and jump up and lick the faces of his family, almost as if to tell them, "She is here."  It turned out that this dog belonged to her.  When any other souls would come through, the dog would get quiet and sit down next to us.  Dogs are very intuitive and definitely have a sense of spirit.

This daughter had passed from cancer of the stomach and from diagnosis to her passing, it was a whirlwind.  She acknowledged the hard decisions that her mother had to make and told her not to hold any guilt for the decisions she made.  She kept showing me a picture of waving her hands over her passing, symbolizing that she did not want to talk about that part.  She said, "My death has been talked about enough, I want to talk about my life."  Her mother validated this and said that they thought that the cancer was in a very small area or completely gone when they went in to do exploratory surgery.  When she was opened up, they found that it had spread all over.  Her mother had to make the decision to place feeding tubes as her daughter was unconscious.  She decided to let the doctors do it but she always questioned this decision.  Her daughter said that the outcome would have been the same and that her mother did the very best she could.  It was suspected that something went wrong while putting the feeding tubes in and she went downhill quickly.  She passed away just a few months after this was done.  She said that she was at peace with her passing and that she was so happy to be out of her sick body.  She kept saying to me, "My mom is so amazing."  She also expressed how much gratitude she had for her dad and said that she was his "Little princess." 

She talked about a grandfather that she was with and said that he had helped her cross over.  She validated some of the emotions and physical trials that her family was facing since the passing and gave them reassurance.  Her fiance was present in the session.  This girl told me that  a move was coming.  Her fiance started to cry and said that she was being forced to move for her job and that it was incredibly hard to leave her home because it was the home that they had lived in together.  She said that often times, near the end of her life, her fiance had sat with her, holding her hand, not always knowing what to say but never letting go of her hand.  She said it meant the world to her.  She pointed out the fact that her fiance had a tattoo in her honor and was getting more.  Her fiance asked if she had a preference as to what it was.  She said, "She never believed in guardian angels before I died.  I want her to put an angel on her arm so that she knows I am that for her."  Her fiance validated this and said she was right...she never believed in angels until her passing. 

This sweet girl lead an amazing life.  She showed me a picture of her playing softball and said that her family was so supportive.  She had a really funny sense of humor and at one point, she said, "I was kind of a celebrity around home, I had no idea!"  Her family laughed and said it was true.  People came out of the woodwork after her passing to tell them how much she had touched their lives. She was so brave in her fight with cancer and continued to spread her love in a big way.  She was gay and chose to be true to herself no matter the judgement and in that, inspired others to be who they really were. 

I could go on and on with the messages she gave.  She was such a beautiful soul but one part stood out to me and she actually repeated it twice throughout the session.  She said, "Our relationship was like swinging on a swing.  It felt free and happy with the wind blowing on our faces.  I was able to swing so high.  I saw an opportunity to jump from my swing and really fly and I had to take it!"  She then showed me a picture of her flying through the air with her arms outstretched and her eyes closed, flying and really loving every moment of her old life and her new.  She was truly free!

As we finished her session, her mother said to me that her daughter had worked as a CNA.  She said that when her daughter realized  her cancer was terminal, she told her mom that she knew of a hospice nurse who was a Medium and had asked her to come and see me after she passed away.  I cannot even express how much this touched me.  I realized after the session, that I had met this beautiful girl in passing and had no idea that she was ever sick.  She was truly so brave and compassionate right up to her very last breath.

 I learned a valuable lesson.  For so many years I hid the fact that I was a Medium because I was afraid of what people would think.  In finally being true to myself, someone else was able to experience a gift that I could share.   I will never again remain quiet when I have promised to be a messenger!  I have been inspired by this family to always be true to myself.  I will remember this amazing girl and give my whole heart for my whole life!  Thank you for that lesson and thank you sharing your daughter's experience.  I am truly honored to have met all of you!

"Happy Father's Day"

This is such a special topic to write about and one that is very close to my heart as I truly believe that I have the very best dad around!  He is the most gentle, compassionate, humble, and kind man I have ever known.  I know that in the beginning, when I started to do this work, he didn't completely understand what this gift was or how this all worked.  I didn't understand!  But he always loved and supported me and never questioned, just trusted that I would find my path.  He has been that for all of us children, he makes us laugh, he keeps life in perspective and he helps us believe that anything is possible.  Thank you dad!

I met with a lady recently who had lost her father a few years ago.  They shared such a special bond and I could feel that he adored her!  She really missed him.  He showed me pictures of all of the conversations that they shared even after his passing.  He said, "She talks to me everyday and she always asks me to help her make decisions."  He was so honored that she could still feel him with her and she kept him close through her thoughts.  Her father then showed me a picture of himself standing in front of two great big lines of people.  I could see that they represented two family lines.  They were separate but then they merged together and I could see that he was smiling about that.  I asked his daughter what this meant and she said that he had been adopted but they didn't know this until the last few years of his life.  She said that it was really hard for her father to deal with this and felt that he didn't know who he really was.  She was so happy to see that he was with both families and that they were coming together as one.  She asked if he was at peace with that and he said something so simple but made so much sense, "We are not made up of blood on the other side.  We are bonded in our love and devotion to each other."  Being a father does not mean a bloodline, but a love line.  Thank you to all of you "dad's" who have fulfilled that role so beautifully!  Biological or not, you mean the world to us!

Another one of my recent favorites was with a man who had lost his father at a young age.  He was only 17 when his father was taken from the physical world in a trucking accident.  His dad felt so close in our session,  I could literally feel him sitting right next to his son.  He told me that his son had followed in his footsteps and was a truck driver as well.  He showed me a picture of his son looking over in the passenger seat and knowing that his dad was right next to him.  This big tough truck driver became emotional and said, "Yes I do!  I feel him with me all the time!"  His father brought up many different events and validated all of the times that he was watching over and guiding his family.  He talked about each one of his grandchildren and validated that he knew them intimately and had spent time with them before they came to this world.  He then said the sweetest words and words that I hear so often, "Son you make me proud!"

One thing I have learned in doing this work is that the other side does not consist of judgment.  There is nothing but unconditional love and acceptance.  People often say that they were nervous to come because they worried about being chastised.  The only chastising that I ever hear is when they tell us to "love ourselves, or forgive ourselves."  The only negative they ever say is when they have regrets that they want to address and then they always ask for understanding and forgiveness.  They tell me all the time that relationships are all that matter on this side and the other.  I have also noticed that their ability to be near us is entirely based upon our allowing them to be near us.  If we have any guilt or resentment towards them or if we build walls around our hearts to keep out the pain, we keep them away as well.  Let them be near and learn to recognize them in the way that they still communicate. 

I also want to thank not just my earthly father but my Heavenly Father.  I am grateful for the trials I have had and the lessons I have learned.  I am thankful to learn to trust in that guidance more everyday and know that God is love and love alone.  We are always protected.  We are always guided.  We are always more then enough in God's eyes because we are the essence of that and we can't be anything less. 

Happy Father's Day!  We love you!!

"Please Forgive Me"

I recently did a group session and at the beginning of every session I do, I explain that the work I do is dedicated to healing and that I rededicate myself to that purpose with every client I meet.  I usually leave it at that but this particular time I felt impressed to tell them that, "The most important messages from the other side will come through the strongest and if there is forgiveness or feelings that are anything less then loving, they will be addressed first.  The loved ones that come through from the other side will use this precious time for whatever they feel is the most healing.  It may surprise you who will come through."

As we began our session, many relatives gave beautiful messages and had something for every person there.  About half way through, I could feel a grandmother who had a message for a sweet lady named Natalie.  This grandmother felt like a strong person who wanted to speak her mind.  She also let me know that she had been gone for a long time and was connected to her father.  Natalie seemed surprised and said that it was her dad's mom and that she did pass away before she was even born.  She said that she had been an alcoholic and that she had died of cancer. She said that her grandfather really loved her but had to leave her due to the addiction.

I could then feel a strong emotion from her as she told me that she was so sick in this lifetime.  Her soul felt like it was crying out for understanding and forgiveness!  She also said that this was a "generational illness that was now affecting her family."  Natalie became very emotional and said that her brother was in rehab at this present moment.  Her grandmother was pleading for Natalie to talk to her father and let him know that she was "good, she was a good person now."  She said that her name was not talked about in a very good light and she wanted, more then anything, to be forgiven as she had forgiven herself.  She said that she was finally free of all of the chains she carried in the physical world but the emotional burden was still being carried in the generations that followed her.  She said that by forgiving the generations past and healing those relationships, future generations would be affected and the addiction chain could be broken.

Natalie was very tearful about this and said that her father never spoke about his mother but about a month ago, they did have a conversation about her and as her grandmother said, it was not a positive conversation.  Natalie's energy felt very similar to her grandmothers and I could tell that even though she wasn't aware, there had been a strong connection.  Her grandmother needed her help and knew that her kind heart would lead her to take the steps that needed to be done to "Break the chains and that by healing their own hearts, generations past, present, and future would benefit."  

This is a topic that has been coming up almost everyday.  I am shocked at how often "Generational Healing."  Is talked about.  I believe that very strong, very experienced souls are present on the earth at this time and have agreed to break the chains once and for all.  There are some things that can be taken care of in the physical world that cannot be healed the same way on the other side.  I believe that as our earth evolves to more "Christ Consciousness," the lower vibrational energies such as addiction, disease, depression, insecurities, whatever it may be, will not longer be able to exist in our higher vibrational mind, body, and souls!  That is why the diseases are becoming more intense and more prevalent.  The purification of lower vibrational energy on the earth begins with each one of us, taking responsibility to heal our own souls and cleanse ourselves of any pain, judgement, or grudges.  Our souls are the essence of Divinity....allow yourself to believe that and dismiss anything that feels less.  I will post more information on generational healing and ways to do that but it begins with understanding and forgiveness.

Natalie visibly softened and said that she would do whatever she could to bring understanding to her family.  It was a relief for her to know that there was an action she could take to break the addiction chain that was so heart breaking for her and her family. 

Thank you Natalie for being open to this message and I pray it helps someone else.  God bless you and your family with healing for all your generations past, present, and future!

"Jump Off the Chess Board"

This is from a recent phone session I did for a lady in California.  I wanted to share because it had some great messages but also, the messages came to me in a unique way.

Like I have said before, I usually see pictures and "movies" in my mind.  They often explain a scenario that is relevant to my client but is often not something that I understand.  This one was so different but it paints a really good picture that applies to a lot of us. 

We began our session, and right off, I could see a chess game.  It appeared to be in black and white.  The room was dimly lit and there was a man who was playing the game.  There was a very empty, lonely feeling around this game and I could see that the player was strategically trying to move into the queen spot.  I then saw a picture of the queen piece standing tall but I noticed that all of the other pieces were turned in a different direction.  None of them were facing the queen.  I heard the words, "You are finally in the Queen spot, but nobody is looking." 

I then saw a picture of the queen being turned around and facing the other direction.  Then suddenly the queen just Jumped off of the chess board.  As soon as she did, it was like "The Wizard of Oz."  Everything suddenly became colorful and I could see this little plastic chess piece turn into a very excited, very alive woman, who happened to be the woman I was talking to.  I saw her wake up and be passionate about her work which I felt was with animals, specifically horses.  I saw her in a healing environment and being able to help people heal through the horses. I kept hearing the phrase, "Take a leap of faith." 

This sounds like a very strange parable but it made perfect sense to this woman.  Apparently, she had been working in her family business for most of her adult life.  She said that her relationship with her father and sibling was strained and that she felt like she had been seeking approval through her job for all these years.  She also said that she had been longing to start an equestrian healing program and had written out the plan almost six years ago.  Interestingly enough, the name she had chosen was, "A Leap of Faith."  The message for her was to jump off the board and follow her passion.  That desire was placed in her heart for a reason and I truly believe, and am told in a lot of sessions, to set your intentions.  Believe that it is possible, ask for help and trust each inspiration that you receive.  Step into that role in every way and see that experience through the eyes of someone who has already created it and is living it.  'I am" statements are very powerful!  Say the words "I am" living my dream life and I am grateful for it.  Gratitude is the key to receiving.  Be grateful for everything that shows up for you no matter how small and know that your most heart felt desires are placed there by a divine source and you have asked in this lifetime to co-create those desires!  You will not be let down, just stay in gratitude and trust the process. Stay unattached to the unfolding or the "how" because that is where faith comes in.  Trust the timing and you will be shown the next step...always...every time.

I love the lessons I get to learn in this work and I so appreciate all of you for allowing me to share them.  Together, we are creating a beautiful world and "I am" Grateful!!  Love to you all!  

"You Are Still Carrying Me"

This was a story from a recent session in which a mother came to hear messages from her young son who had passed away approximately ten years ago after a two year battle with leukemia.  By the way, when people call to schedule a session, I  ask that I am only given the first name and no further information so that I am not swayed at all in my messages.

That being said, I was unaware that this mother had gone through this experience but this sweet little boy kept coming to me and showing me a picture of his mother carrying him in her arms.  He said that she had to carry him a lot when he was sick because he was very weak and was in so much pain.  He then said, "Mom you are still carrying me and I am able to walk now."  He also said, "I am so much heavier when you feel like you have to carry me, please set me down and I will stand up and walk with you.  Let me take you by the hand and walk."  I loved this beautiful message and his mother was very emotional.  She said that his passing had been so hard for her.  She felt like a part of her had died with her son.  He assured her that no matter what they would have done as far as treatment, the outcome would have been the same.  It was his time to go.  He thanked her for all the time she spent with him, loving and caring for him but he wanted her to know that he was still alive in spirit and was with her all the time.

He also said that he was happy about her decision in "giving something of his away."  He said that she was so unselfish in that choice. She smiled and said that made her happy.  She told me after the session that their family had been working really hard to raise money for him to have a bone marrow transplant.  They were unable to have this done before he passed away and so this amazing mother, without hesitation, gave all of the money they had earned to another family who was also awaiting transplant.

His messages for her were so beautiful and loving.  He told her that he had passed peacefully and just went to sleep.  He also told her that he was greeted by his grandfather and that he immediately recognized him.  He also said that when children pass, it is a special homecoming and that he was able to be with those that his mother had prayed to for help.  In his case he was with God, Jesus Christ, and the Mother Mary.  She said that she had asked that they take care of him.   This is so powerful, the prayer of a mother! 

Another interesting point in this session was that this mother did not speak any English but spoke Portuguese.  Her other son came with her to translate.  I didn't think about it until after but her father and mother both gave messages from the other side as well.  I realized after, that they spoke no English either in this lifetime.  Love is a universal language and the messages that I receive come as inspiration and impressions that I feel "heart to heart." It doesn't matter what language they speak or what differences they have, the messages come in a way that we can all  understand them.

People often ask me if I hear them with my ears and the answer is no.  I feel them in my soul.  We all do!  We all have those moments that we feel like we should call a friend or that we should give someone a message.  We are all 'Mediums" and are often being used as instruments of healing for each other.  The more we learn to recognize and act on these impressions, the more we will receive them.

I love teaching people to develop and trust their own intuition!  If you are interested in learning more about this, please private message me or call me at 801-910-7591.  I am passionate about this work and teaching others to embrace their own gifts!

Thank you my sweet new friends for letting me share your story and God bless you in your healing journey!

"My Grandpa Told Me To Hit the Deck"

One more post for Memorial Day!  This was from a recent session with a man who had served in the Army for over 20 years. 

His session had many parts that were amazing but one thing really impressed me and I appreciate him allowing me to share it. 

His grandfather came through and had been a very tough, stern, military man as well.  He said that he was so very proud of this young man and that he had followed in his family's footsteps and had served his country well.  He then said that there was a specific time that he saved this man's life.  He told him to "HIT THE DECK."   He also said that he had been worried about his grandson. 

Later that night,this man messaged me saying, "At one point last night you were talking about my grandfather and said that he had saved my life and that while he was alive, he was worried about me.  I knew what you were talking about with him saving me but I always thought that he hated me, so the worried thing confused me.  After talking to you, I called my mom and she said that the last thing he said before he died was that he was worried about me.  Him saving me in Iraq...I just had a feeling that I should hit the ground and I did.  If I would have ignored that feeling, I would be dead.  I always knew that it was my grandpa telling me to HIT THE DECK"

This man also told me that this particular message was what solidified for him that there actually was an afterlife.  I was so touched by this experience for so many reasons.  The healing power of love and family bonds do not severe at death.  This grandfather loved his grandson so much and even though it may have been hard for him to show it in this lifetime, he was able to in the next. 

Again, thank you for serving our country!  Thank you for putting yourself in harms way to keep us safe, and thank you to your sweet grandfather for helping you to be able to come back home. 

Another great big THANK YOU for letting me share your story!

"Thank You For Bringing My Dad Back Home"

This a post that is very near and dear to my heart.  It also just happened to come about today which is perfectly fitting for Memorial Day.  Therefore, I will be bombarding you all with my stories today but I feel impressed to get these written. 

Today I did a session for my younger brother.  It happens to be the first one I have ever done for him.  It's strange but it is harder for me to read people that I am close to.  It seems to work better with people that I know nothing about so that my thoughts are not swayed and I can depend entirely upon spirit.  But in spite of all that, this session was amazing and our ancestors came through loud and clear. 

He was getting a lot of messages that pertain to his path and opportunities that were coming his way.  It's interesting but almost everything that I said, he said that he had been thinking about.  He has very strong intuition and loved that he was validated on so many specific details. 

In the middle of this session, our great great grandfather came through on our dad's side.  I have never heard anything about him and sadly did not even know his name.  He assured us both that he had been in our lives and had served as a guide at times for all of us.  He then said that there was a very specific time that he was able to protect our dad when he was a Marine in Vietnam.  He showed me a picture of our dad being literally moved out of the way and would have been killed had he stayed. 

My brother went home and talked to our dad about it.  Dad got teary eyed and said that he knows exactly the moment that his great grandfather was talking about.  He said, "I was moved by some other force that was not my own and I knew that I was protected by a grandfather." 

Even as I write this, it makes me cry.  How do you ever thank an ancestor for that kind of love and protection.  Thank you Grandpa....THANK YOU FOR BRINGING MY DAD BACK HOME.

Thank you Daddy-o for your service and your bravery.  You are my hero and the very best man I know!  I love you!

"The Money Does Not Matter....It's All About Love"

This is going to be a little bit different type of post.  I have been getting this message frequently in sessions so I am going to share a few short stories and the messages that are behind them.  The first one was from a session with a lady recently.  Her dad had passed away a few years ago.

During our session, I kept seeing an image of a gold ring attached to a gold necklace.  I asked her about this and she pulled it out from under her shirt.  She said that it was her dad's ring and that she had been wearing it in memory of him.  She had been considering having it melted down into another item like a smaller ring so that she could wear it.  He immediately said, "Take it out and wear it!"  She said that she had considered giving it to a brother.  When she said that I saw an image of this brother putting it away and keeping it as a shrine for his dad.  Her father said that he did not want ANYTHING of his put "up on the shelf." (He was a little bit stern about this!)   He said, "In this world you think that you have to put everything up on a shelf and wait until the most convenient time to use it.  Perhaps when you retire or when you have a little more money in the bank.  The time is now!"  He told her, "Get out and enjoy life while your legs can still carry you!"  It was interesting that he chose those words because little did I know, she had been having a lot of pain in her legs.  It all made perfect sense to her and she said she was going to plan a trip when she got home! 

This sweet dad had also worked very hard in the physical world to provide and leave something for his children.  He had invested in the oil fields and the family was left with some residual earnings after his passing.  This daughter whom I was visiting with was the treasurer for the family and was in charge of dividing out that money.  This had been incredibly stressful for her.  It was not always a peaceful undertaking and she worried that her dad would be upset in how she had managed his assets.  He said to her, "THE MONEY DOES NOT MATTER.  IT'S ALL ABOUT LOVE."  He said that he had worked to hard to provide "LOVE" for his family and that money was just the expression of that.  He said that he was proud of her and to continue to follow her heart in making those financial decisions.  He said that he would direct her in those decisions and always had been.  She was grateful for that and said that she had really sensed him around her when she was having to do that.

The next story was for a woman in a session recently.  Her mother had passed away from cancer when she was only 9 years old.  This was, of course, so hard for a little girl to handle and she had missed her so much.  Her mother talked about things they had done and had such a funny sense of humor.  She had her daughter laughing and crying throughout the whole session.  Her daughter could recall all of those happy memories but she had one that she had felt a lot of guilt over and wanted to ask her mom about it.  She said that one Christmas, she had asked for a typewriter.  She told her mother that a typewriter was all that she wanted and she she didn't care if she got nothing else.  She said that apparently, her mother had looked and looked but was unable to find one.  She gave her other beautiful gifts but this woman, being a small girl, was heartbroken about not getting what she wanted.  She became very emotional in the session and said that she had said some terrible things and made her mom cry.  It was a huge source of guilt and something that she had held onto for all these years.  She asked, "Does my mom forgive me for that?"  Her mother immediately showed me a picture of her handing over a typewriter but this time, she pushed it out of the way and handed her a big box full of love.  She said that the typewriter was just a symbol of how much she loved her daughter and with or without the typewriter, the love was always there."  She said that we put so much emphasis on the physical manifestation of "love" and recognize it more when it's a tangible object.  "If we collect more things, then we must have more love."  She told her daughter how very much she loves her and that she can let go of what that typewriter symbolized but hang on to the fact that the love was given even though it was in a different form then she had asked for.  There was complete understanding and forgiveness.  Her mother asked that she please forgive herself as this was a very small part of what their relationship was. 

How many times do we get caught up in the "things" of this life when they are truly so temporary.  Recognize the message behind the objects and give gratitude for all of the manifestations of love in your life!  Being in the flow of abundance also means allowing that love be given to others and most of all to be enjoyed!  This life is to be experienced.  The memories and the relationships we build are the ONLY thing that lasts!   

Thank you to both of you for letting me share your stories.  Lots of love to both of you!